So I have been a huge stress case this semester and we aren't even half way through yet. Even though I am taking a lot of credits I didn't think it would be as stressful as it has been.
#1 Tests and school in general: All of my teachers like to give tests at the same time. When I have a test I have at least three that same week. And I know I am a Physical Education Major so how hard can my classes really be well let me tell you it isn't all fun and games playing sports all day like everyone thinks. I have had to take anatomy, Physiology and kinesiology (I didn't even know how to say that word at first). I have also had to take sports spychology which is one of my hardest classes. Right now I am taking exercise physiology which is kickin my butt, but I am suprisingly doing pretty good in but I have to study a lot. My other classes I am taking are all time consuming and a ton of assignments. I know it still may be hard for everyone to believe that Physical education is a hard major but just ask professor lyons how hard the classes really can be. I sure didn't know until I had to start taking all the upper division classes.
These next few couple of weeks I have two tests this week, a quiz and 3 papers due. Next week I have two more tests, a paper due and I have to teach an hour lesson to my peers as if they are in jr. high or high school for my health class. I am teaching on emotional abuse which is not very interesting and I have to mak it interesting, make a poster, have and have an activity. I know I want to be a teacher but I will be teaching jr. high and high school students not college students. Teaching my peers terrifies me.
#2 graduation: Also right now I am stressing about graduation and graduation papers. They are a pain in the butt and I have no idea everything they want on them and my advisor never is in her office. I just want them done and over with. I will graduate with exactly the amount of upper credit hours I need and exactly the amount of credit for my major I need. Talk about cuting it close eh?! I am just hoping that I don't have a million time conflicts spring semester and I hope I pass so I can for sure graduate. So far I am getting good grades but I am hoping these last two semesters to do even better so that I can reach my goal of graduating with honors.
#3 Work: I have been working in the Lin's Deli for about four months. First of all I am not fond of the job what so ever. The only thing I like about it is the couple of friends I have made. I have continued to work there to help Ty pay the bills so all the responsibilty wasn't on him. I don't mind working there as much and I am getting used to it, but I don't think the deli manger likes me. I don't understand why because when I am there I work so hard the whole time, and I don't ever even work with her, but I have felt like she hasn't liked me since I have started. Plus she is a little scary. Well right now I am getting so mad and nervous because last week I looked at the schedule for this week and she didn't schedule me all week it said 0 hours. Luckily I am working again the next week but not working at all killed me money wise. Speaking of jobs my other job is rediculous. I coach gymnastics which I love and I love the owners but we have a dushe of a coach (Jeff) in charge of us other coaches. He is the biggest jerk and treats us like we are babies and idiots. It is almost to the point that I can't work there any more. The tiny amount of pay that I get from this job isn't worth the amount of stress he puts on me.
#4 Jeep. I love our jeep and I am so happy that we got it but I am so frustrated with the cop that pulled us over. We only got a fix it ticket but its so dumb. We didn't have mud flapps which most people who have SUVs in the state of Utah don't have mud flapps and he also put that we needed bigger fender flairs. I was so mad and of course it was in millard county they just try to look for an excuse to pull people over there. We have been driving it for a month drive by cops all the time and we haven't gotten pulled over except in fillmore. The mud flapps weren't a big deal but the fender flairs are like $400 and we for sure just don't have $400 laying around. So Dan gave us a great idea that one of his old neighbors did for his jeep. He got the garden curbing that you can get at home depot and cut them to the length of the tire and screwed them into the existing flairs which just extended them out covering the big tires. It worked great it was only $8 compared to $400 and it will get our fix it ticket signed and then off they are coming because the ones we have now passed safety so there wasn't anything wrong with them. Dumb cop. So by Friday we have to find a cop to sign it off for us so we don't have to pay the ticket.
#5 Life. sometimes I just have no idea where our life is taking us and it scares me. I don't know where we are going to be next fall. Where are we going to live? Where are we going to school? I don't know how long my teaching licensure is going to take. I don't know when we are going to start a family of our own. I don't know if I will ever use my degree or if I will get pregnant when I graduate and be a mom without working or if I will be a mom and work. I am terrified to student teach. How do you know when the right time is to start a family? Sometimes I feel like it is and sometimes I don't. How is Ty going to do on the LSAT? Is he going to like Law school? Is he going to like being a Lawyer? I am just bleh right now and it kills me I want to be up beat, fun and social but I haven't been. I feel like I take way too much onto my plate and try to please everyone and honestly I just can't do it all.
2 comments:
I'm so sorry you are stressed out. Just breath and see the light at the end of the tunnel. You will be SOOO glad you did it when you can look back and feel the accomplishment. We love you so much, and we are so glad you are in our family.
You know, on that tag that I did, I shared that one of biggest things I've learned is that there area things you can control and those you can't..so those you can just concentrate on those and work out one thing at a time. I will say that even though Chris and I had to wait for a family, I LOVED the time we've had to get to know each other, learn from each other, and just love my hubby..you'll know when it's time:)
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